I realize that it has been a month since we left for Florida...better late than never. Right?!?! I am following my sister's thought of not having a post without a picture and I have no pictures at work, so this one will have to do. Besides, I like the sun in our face. Poor Alli can not even open up her eyes. Don't I wish we could have brought that back with us. I like the seasons in Michigan, but I like to see sun more. These gloomy days tend to make me the same way. How can I be gloomy with Christmas right around the corner. I have been keeping up with my fellow bloggers and realize that I have more than enough to be thankful for. If my biggest complaint is the sun is not shining, I have to say life is pretty good. Everyone out there having a tough time right now, please remember what doesn't break us only makes us stronger. I SO BELIEVE this!!!! I know it is easy to question God why these things happen, but trust me He does have a plan. I remember trying to have a baby. I only wanted one, just one. Everyone around me was having babies and I had always wanted to be a mom, but it just was not happening. I remember making deals with God, for the record, He doesn't make deals:)! It was a very trying time for me as a person (the person with the problem(s)) and for me and Jimmy. It was hard to deal with the disappointment every month. It is drilled in your head at such a young age, if you have sex, you will have a baby. Jimmy told me he was fine not having kids, but I was not, which led to problems between us. I had always pictured my life with them. Eight awful months of driving to Grand Rapids several times a week, 3 months of shots in my belly and butt, and $20,000 later, I was not only having my SO WANTED BABY...I was having 2!!! If you ask me today to pick my favorite, I would rather die. Those two kids complete me...so I thought! To find out 16 months later that I was pregnant all on my own...CRAZY! My broken girl body decided to actually work...who knew? That baby (along with the Alli and Isaac)...that COMPLETES my family and need. My point is that you have to believe that everything will work out as it should. I remember one of my friends calling me and asking me questions about IVF and memories that were so vivid were just gone! I guess it was just a means to an end. God knew I needed Alli and Isaac together and they would "pave the way" for Ashley. They told me I had a 1 in a million chance for Ashley. If some asked me if I would rather win the lotto or Ash, I would so take her again in a heart beat!!! I am not sure why I just "spilled" all of that. Maybe it is because it is the holiday season and I have to remind myself how wonderful the season is because of those three kids. Their faces on Christmas morning are priceless! The wonder and excitement are contagious and I love it. I know there are people out there who question my "mother skills" and think I should be different, but honestly, how can I be? All I can do with these three miracles is love them. I have EARNED that right! Before I was a mom, I was going to be a great CALM mom, who did all of these great things with her kids, and they were going to be great calm kids. You know what, 1 out of 2 ain't bad! They are GREAT, calm maybe not, but they are working on it, as am I. I think it is great that they are confident enough in themselves and know that they are loved no matter what. That to me is priceless. Raising kids is hard work, to know that they feel loved is HUGE!
Ok, so this entry really had nothing to do with Epcot and it kind of rambled on about nothing, but it is something to me. Those three kids and Jimmy are everything to me. So my Christmas gifts this Christmas are once again my three kids and husband. I will let you know when the excitement and "fabulousness" of this gift wears off. Trust me, I have my moments when I would like to return my models for the "upgraded" version, but at the end of the day, the "imperfections" are my favorite thing about them. Those imperfections are what helps me grow as a person, wife and mother. Merry Christmas to me and all of you in Blogger world!!
3 comments:
Whoever is questioning your 'mother skills'.....give me names so I can go and beat them up!!!! You are a WONDERFUL mom who many admire!!
Everything you said is so true. If we don't come away from hardship stronger, then we miss a valuable chance to grow. Its amazing how weak we feel when going through something but looking back I often wondered how I've survived! Well, I am pretty proud of who I have become and I am proud of you too. We all have parental short-comings. Most of the "calm" parents I know tend to just ignore whats going on with their kids. Or they dont disipline. I am not a calm parent. you will never hear me say, "Now, now Teagen. Please stop drawing on your face with that Sharpie."
You are a GREAT parent.I know this by this little blog and all the love for them written down. By all that you went through to get those kids here today.You are a REAL parent. Who cares what anyone has to say. YOU are responsible for YOUR family. Anyone who doesn't like it should mind their own business and raise their own kids (OR DOGS)!
Questioning your mother skills? Just remember how many cousins you have over 6 feet tall and 200+ lbs. WE will set them straight! Have a Merry Christmas and enjoy the rest of the Holiday season.
Post a Comment